I like assertive submissives
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I don't feel threatened by assertive submissives or slaves. On the contrary, I quite like them.
I think that it makes them more interesting and more demanding in a good way. I like them to be intelligent, to have a mind of their own, and I like them to have good-to-high standards.
For me BDSM - and much of life in general - is an opportunity to challenge myself and to grow. But when I say challenge, I don't mean challenge as in challenging my authority, being a tease, or being a smart-ass. It's about helping me have opportunities to improve myself so that I can then take better advantage of what the world has to offer.
I don't consider submissives as being there solely as targets for my mighty and masterly will. Of course, they are such targets sometimes and I think it's important to regularly exercise my mighty and mastery will so that it stays the fresh, invigorated and finely-honed implement that it is and doesn't become listless or flabby.
But a submissive or slave being thoughtful, intelligent and opinionated is actually what I call a service. A cluey and experienced slave can keep me on my toes and draw my attention to things that I may have slipped up on. It's not just their body that's at my service, nor is it just their ability to carry heavy packages or run errands, and nor is it just their ability to tirelessly suck cock like an industrial vacuum cleaner. I look for and expect an intelligent and incisive mind to be there at my beck and call as well.
And having that intelligent and incisive mind available, I don't put it to use with make-work like solving algebra problems or hunting for new prime numbers. Much more useful to me is having that mind active and involved with what I'm doing, part of my projects with me, equally knocking crap ideas on the head as much as she supports and helps me develop good ones. It's important that at all times she's aware of this, just as much as she's aware of who wears the pants (so to speak):
- Her: "Master, I don't think this is right."
- Me: "Thank you for letting me know, however keep licking and I'll fix it up later."
I don't think that there's a conflict between being submissive or slave and being assertive. In fact, I don't think that there's any connection between assertiveness and submissiveness or between assertiveness and slaviness.
My dictionary says that "assertiveness" is about "having or showing a confident and forceful personality". There's no problem there as far as I'm concerned. No one ever told me that being a master was going to be easy and having a strong and confident partner is a good thing in my books. I don't want a doormat. I mean, I know plenty of doormats. Some of them are quite interesting, intelligent and attractive people. And there's a place for them in BDSM, which I suppose you could say is underfoot. But the service I'm interested in personally is being challenging.
Shy and timid can be appealing, especially in young submissives, but only for a short time. Overall, I prefer submissives who are confident, assertive and who are keen to make themselves part of my team, even if it is just the two of us. It can be difficult, if not impossible, to form a team otherwise.